we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
