Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Can vaginas get frostbite?
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
