I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
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