he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Randomize
