3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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