i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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