it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
