You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
