Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
