butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize