You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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