is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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