Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
