You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
Randomize
