everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
