This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
