I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
My boob is missing a layer of skin
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Randomize
