Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize
