did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
