Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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