Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
