thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize