I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I won't apologize to a one balled man
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
