brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
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