Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
