what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
