rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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