oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Randomize
