can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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