hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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