The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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