This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
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