His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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