shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
