a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
