I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I just blew my weed a kiss
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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