First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
