ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
