Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize
