One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
