jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
are you so shy because you have an std?
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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