And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
