Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize