I'm really into asian looking animals
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Randomize
