I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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