I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
