I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
