Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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