How'd it feel making her break her religion?
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize