I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Randomize
