Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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