You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
